Saturday, February 28, 2009

Extreme Sports

Back when the X games were a thing (I only knew about them because Brandon thought they'd be the coolest thing EVERRRRRR, mostly due to the media telling him it was the coolest thing EVERRRRR) I had my own opinion as to what, exactly, should be 'ultimate' sports rules. At least as far as baseball goes.

Now, baseball used to accurately be dubbed America's Game. Most the Americans I know that care about a sport, care for football (or lie and say they do. Frankly any game that takes a break every 10 seconds is a big old snooze fest for me!). So one might say (and those football fans do) that FOOTBALL is America's favorite pastime, right?

When Brandon and I were dating we went to a Mariner's game with his brother and my friend, Anita. Anita was as in to sports as I was. Actually, if it was possible, she was in to sports LESS than I was. Brandon and Leonard, however, were nuts about all of it. Hockey, football, baseball, basketball, pro, college, didn't matter they would watch it and find something to argue about during it (mostly about how they could easily do it better/right/farther/harder and/or how the refs/judges/etc were so being paid by the other team. Didn't matter who the other team was).

Needless to say they were less than thrilled when Anita asked me how many quarters would be happening before it was over. I saw the eye rolling from the testosterone side of the seats and corrected her that they were not quarters and were clearly PERIODS. Right?

As we realized not only were we holding out for the SEVEN innings (Oh, that little stretch? It's just a teaser? you're not done?) I mean, NINE innings, we found multiple ways to make the game a whole lot more fun to watch.

1. The batter should not drop the bat before running the bases. Rather, he should carry it with him while he is on the field. Why? Because....

2. They should not have to TAG players out, just throwing the ball at them and hitting them should suffice. No more pickeling between third and home, just lob the ball at him. This is fair because...

3. Batters still have their bats (see rule #1) and should treat an attempted beaning with the ball as a pitch. Swing away and hit the ball back out to the outfield. Keep your helmet on, too. Why? Because...

4. Your teammates are also running bases and having baseballs hucked at them. Should they connect with their bat you don't want to get out of the game AND conciousness from a rogue 'freedom' hit (as I've dubbed them. Just now.) from another base line. Protect your head.

If the baseball folk would just enact these four simple rules, along with the one I think EVERYONE knows is right, Allow Steriods, viewership, ticket sales, and insurance would all increase and the game could then reclaim its rightful place as America's favorite pastime.

Bowling on the Palouse

The flu is over. In celebration of feeling so much better I convinced Aiden that we should take the kids bowling. We hit up Zeppoz.

Brandon used to make fun of my bowling style. It turns out Aiden sees the same Shot Put technique going on. Fine, I bowl weird.

Alex must have gotten his technique from the genetics he got from me. The big difference is he throws bowling balls discus style instead of shot put style.

Maybe lawn bowling would be better for our family.

The girls have their own style, generally a combination of Granny Bowling and the ramp they can slide the balls down. At one point, in an effort to get more oomph! behind her ball Ashley resorted to trying to Granny Ball it with a kick after it. She missed, luckily for her toes, but that didn't stop Annie from trying the kick approach on her next turn.

Our lane kept turning itself off every 4 turns or so. After 7 times of having to turn it back on the people who work there finally changed us to the next lane over. I don't know why they didn't do it up front but they did give us 25 extra minutes to let us finish our game. In all, a fun time. Then we went to Lick's and got kid scoops (and grown up scoops!). Yummy!!

Some fun pictures from our adventure at Zeppoz:

PS- the video is fun. If you have spare time (no pun intended but it was easy!) check out some of the other videos on youtube about bowling. Some are dumb, as usual, but some are freakin' hilarious.

Until it said it was an ad I thought it was a video about "when the Young/Rushings go bowling"

Friday, February 27, 2009

Marco..... POLO!

When you live in a tiny apartment playing hide and seek requires more work than it maybe ought to. Ashley is up for the challenge. She has three, sometimes four, spots she hides in so it's generally not a problem that she plays hide and seek all. the. time. When there's time for it Aiden and I will pretend to search the entire 300 square feet (or something) of apartment looking everywhere she could possibly be except behind the rocking chair.

Because clearly, she'd hide in the cat box before she'd hide behind the rocking chair.

Sometimes she gets so excited she's willing to overlook the part where we make eye contact with her. Other times she forgives our "seeking" being confined to the parts of the house which can be seen from sitting on the couch.

When we play hide and seek at Gramma Miff's house, she's the best. She refuses to hide with Annie because Annie only wants to hide with people who will talk to her while they wait to be found (and she doesn't know why she's always found FIRST!). Ashley takes her hiding seriously.

While I have mentioned that Annie is picking up on snarkiness in the past, today I learned that we need to put in some more work on the "playing along" front.

I was trying to find Ashley so I could dry her hair and get us all out the door. Since there was no pressing reason we needed to leave sooner than later I decided to look for her. She was harder to find than usual due to the giggling that kept coming from under the computer desk.

I roped Annie into looking for her by over exaggerating my request and winking about 100 times as I pleaded "help me find Ash, okay?". This was a lot of winking. She winked back about 10 times and giggled. "okay"

While I checked the cat box, the bathtub, the closet, the oven, and the dryer, Annie marched down the hall, gave a triumphant yelp, and then carried on a conversation with the missing child until I came down the hall.

Winking at her again (I must have looked like I was having some sort of seizure) I asked if she knew where Ashley was. She winked back a bunch, covered her mouth with both hands and nodded. Then she fully extended her left arm and pointed under the desk. "she's right there!"

I asked again, winking all along and now pointing to the wink and shaking my head, "Do you know where Ashley is?"

She again winked back, giggled, shook her head back at me and pointed for all she was worth.

She kind of looked like she was expecting a bounty or a finders' fee.

After 2 or 3 more rounds of asking she finally understood.

"OOOOOHHHH!!! No, I don't know".

I got the camera out to capture Annie's head hunting venture but obviously I had forgotten the inability of Annie's neck to hold her head upright within the vicinity of a camera once it's turned on. (I could offer proof but you'll have to take my word for it).
Note the hiding Ashley who still doesn't know she's been found.

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

What Mess?

"I can't WIIIIPE!!"

"why not?"

"The TOILET PAper is not on the Rooolllllllll!!!"

Well, duh.

Sugar, Spice, and Everything Nice

My girls must have been mixed with a dash of leftover Alex while in the womb. A snail or snake in this one, a leftover snip of puppy dog tail in that one. Otherwise, yesterday would not have been like this: (this is only a snippet, no pun intended, the whole day was similar-ish)

Aiden went off to dutifully and lovingly stay awake in my class and take notes for me so I would not be more behind than I have to be. He told the girls, I'm sure, to be good for Mom and let her get some rest.

They got half of it right. The other half was discovered when I wandered out to get some Saltines. (I could lie and say it was to check on them but I am sick and I am self-centered whilst sick, I guess, so it totally wasn't. I kind of forgot they were here, honestly).

For Christmas Annie got a gigantic floor mat coloring/cut-n-paste/watercolor activity book starring BARBIE. It has crayons and glue and markers and paints and brushes all attached to the side.

The first time I wandered out (to actually check on them) they were coloring the book. Right on. Keep it clean so Aiden doesn't freak out when he gets home.

The next time I wandered out I was blindsided by the vision of pink tinted water pouring out of a sparkly yellow Scooby Doo cup across the table, onto two chairs, then *plip plip plipping* onto the floor. And two little girls looking shocked as all hell. I don't know if the shock was from how I looked, that I was up, that they were caught, or that it had happened.

I told them to grab a towel but Annie went running for the paper towels and pulled off the very last one. THEN SHE SHRUGGED.

I made her go grab an actual towel from the laundry pile (3 feet away). She thought her job was over then but she was WRONG.

I started cleaning it up and then I had to ask: What is the mashed up paper product in this mess?

Ashley apparently thought adding napkins to the Scooby cup while Annie painted would be something to do.

Her big punishment was to change clothes from the Barbie pink tinged water covered clothes she and Annie had spent all morning putting together (so they'd match). Annie got to help clean and had to watch her crap get thrown away.

And I got to learn a new way to yell at my kids while having the flu and a diminished lung capacity. Whispered lectures are not as gratifying and still induce coughing fits.

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Last Day

Alex's Jump Rope For Heart donations can be made up until noon tomorrow. Then he starts the actual jumping.

Please, if you think you can donate at all, do it now before you forget.

A HUGE thank you to those lovely folks who did donate already.

And remember you can send a check written out to the American Heart Association to us and we'll get it to the right place, just send it NOW. **


**Update: Apparently I am dumb. If you want to send less than $25 via check you can but please call me and let me know so I can front the money and then you can send a check written to me. The goods are due at noon today or they don't count. Or something.

Uh, nevermind

You can disregard the last post. At least the part about how the attendance policy sucks so bad. Aiden got home and had me check the syllabus. Turns out I CAN miss class and not be docked on it because I have a doctor's note.

Doc. Tor's. Note.

Beautiful syllables.

In case you can't tell, my fever's back. Bad.

I'm going to go crawl in a hole and wait for the kind face of the grim reaper now.

And because he's so nice

I feel like poop. I feel like white crusted until it sat in the yard all winter and slightly melted into the spring thaw poop.

But I cannot miss class.

My doctor at the urgent care place said not to go for a couple of days minimum. Then he wrote me a note for the entire week.

There is one class I CAN'T miss and others I just shouldn't. So Aiden is going to class for me today. Right now, he's navigating the labyrinth of Todd Hall to find the right room and take notes for me.

How great is that?

And, as a special treat to my speech teacher, I will be in class this afternoon. I will sit front and center and I will cough all my flu-y flu like germs at you with the hopes of infecting you.

Thanks for making the attendance policy so freakin' flexible. It's really your own fault. I mean, I don't want to sit in the back and cough all over EVERYONE so I'll sit up front to minimize the damage.

And I love LOVE love that another guy from that class was in urgent care yesterday, too. He had a cough and "cold". Just because I hate the dumb teacher so much (and not because I don't like him because I don't care about him either way) I hope he has the flu, too.

Maybe we can be coughing buddies and cover each other's lapse in coughing whilst we try to catch our breath and/or suck our inside out lung back into our chest cavity.


Monday, February 23, 2009

I AM going to whine

I wasn't going to. I was going to suck it up, put on my big girl panties, and be a man.

I guess all of those things do not go together as well as one might hope.

Regardless, after the negative rapid strep test a week and a half ago my throat/sinus area have been on an every-other-day pattern. One day I felt pretty good and thought I'd shaken whatever it was. The next, I so totally knew I hadn't.

Sunday morning at 4:30 am things got more ugly than they've been in a long time. I woke up coughing (a lot), threw up, had a fever, and felt awful. I think I sucked it up fairly well by not getting out of bed, moving only so far as to roll over and back (which was taxing!), and taking a bath.*

The bath did not make things better, now I had all the aches and pains AND wet hair. My skin hurts, my hair hurts, EVERYthing hurts.

Long story short (and I've lost my attention span), I went to the urgent care clinic this afternoon. The choices of what is wrong with me were:

1. a viral issue

2. the flu. Not the flu but THE FLU

3. something bacterial

If it was number 1, I was on my own. Number 2 can be helped by some pills that will take about 1 day off of the normal 7 day span. Number 3 means antibiotics (!!!!!).

The best test? Shoving this thing up my nose into my sinus cavity to get a sample and test the sample for the flu. Well, that's what the doctor said. What it felt like was having my frontal lobe pulled out of my nostril by a Qtip with a scrubby end.

10 minutes later he came back and informed me I have the flu. Hopefully we got it in the first 48 hours so the pills can actually help. He gave me a note for missing class (which I don't think I can do anyway) a couple of prescriptions, and a kind look.

I kept asking him if he could make my hair stop hurting or make the sweating go away. He kept saying "no". I told him I was up for getting an epidural between C1 and C2 so I would ONLY feel my hair but he said something about how flopping around wouldn't help me get better from the flu. I think he doesn't know. He said the guy would come give me my epidural in 15 minutes. But the test was only 10 minutes so I guess I missed him. I should have double checked the home visit policy for the anesthesiologists at the hospital before leaving.

***Things in my family can always be fixed by taking a bath. Mom broke her arm when she was a kid and Grandma's answer was "take a bath, you'll feel better". (she did get it fixed later that day) Mom would say it to us and then tell the story about how that was Grandma's answer to things. Nevertheless, I take a bath to see if I'll feel better, to this day.

Saturday, February 21, 2009

For Once The Cats Messed Up Right

About a week ago the ancient camera that I have had since I was pregnant with Ashley was left on the end of our counter. Y'know that part you want to call a "bar" but that is really just the end of the wall only half a wall high. Things get set there all the time. The napkin holder lives there, the cell phones get charged there, etc. The camera got left there.

Our cats, who have no manners, climb on everything while we are asleep. That is when they are not trying to use their heads as battering rams to get in our door or meowing incessantly. During their travels that night they knocked the camera to the floor. I saw it the next morning but just picked it up without checking to see if it still works.

Aiden tried to use it later on and found that the zoom function is now another way to click the shutter. This means our out dated camera was as state of the art as Grandma's Kodak.

SOooooo... A trip to Wal-Mart was in order. I got a new camera. It was about $200 cheaper than the dead one (at the time of purchase), has about double the zoom, a WAY bigger screen, better resolution, more pixels, and it's awesome. The only thing it cannot do is shoot in black and white which, as Aiden pointed out, I can fix in photo shop. I'm so excited, I want something fun to happen so I can get the camera out and break it in.

This camera is the wrong model but looks almost identical to the right model. In case you care, we got teh Olympus FE-330 with 8 megapixel and 5x optical zoom. (For those of you who are not Shaila and haven't researched the crap out of cameras, most affordable digital cameras max the optical zoom at 3x). AND the digital zoom is not useless because the megapixels are so much better. Awesome.

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Our Son Alex Would Like Your Help

Did you know Jump Rope For Heart has been around for 30 years? I am jumping rope and raising money to help the American Heart Association fight heart disease and stroke in Jump Rope For Heart. Can you please help me by making a donation that will help save lives?

My stepdad, Aiden, has done a lot of fundraising in the past and is helping me. He said one of the things he liked about the AHA is that they only use 7% of their budget for operating costs. I'm not totally sure what that means, but he explained to me that it means more money goes to research and the people who need it.

If you want to donate you can go to my donation page. The American Heart Association's online fundraising website has a minimum donation amount of $25.00. If you want to donate less, that's totally ok. You can just send the check right to me and I'll make sure the American Heart Association gets it. Just ask and we'll get you the correct address.

Thanks for your support and helping me save lives!

Support research, education, and community programs leading the fight against America's No. 1 killer, cardiovascular disease by donating to American Heart Association's Jump Rope For Heart.
Please let me know if you have any questions.

UPDATES: AKA PEOPLE WHO ROCK THE JUMP (brought to you by Holly as Aiden is too cool to type like this):

Traci Donated $40!!!

Gramma B Donated $200! WOW!!!

Aftan Donated $25!

In a world of 19 year olds, I feel OLD

I know that 29 is not that old. I know 30 is a death sentence. I do.

The problem is the 10,000 students I go to school with. They DON'T know these things.

I am in this speech class, for example, and we had to give a speech about "a nature event". So I talked about how we had a bazillion trees in our backyard when I was little. And how Dad built us a suspension bridge between two of those trees (as part).

(Okay, speech is going well, but there's confusion here... WHY would Dad build this? Right.)

"My dad built this for us after we went and saw-"

That's when it hit me. Hard.

"I was old enough to see the Indiana Jones movies in the theatres. The first time they were released."

Up to this point the class had been helpfully avoiding eye contact (I think we find it's easier on the person up front). All of the sudden there was a lot of pairs of eyes staring me down, amusement shining in them all.

So yes, I'm not as old as a lot of people. A LOT. The whole baby boomer generation comes to mind. But age is kind of a framework thing and I am stretching the frame of age around WSU. Not single handedly but definitely helping. Or making it worse. something.

Also how I know? Ashley's teacher said something about MacGyver the other day and I called her on whether she was actually old enough to know what she was referencing. (This was NOT because I walk around drawing attention to myself but because she slightly mocked the kids for not getting the reference)

Then the assistant teacher and I talked about Mr. Belvidere (?), Punky Brewster, Benson, and Webster. Just as I was solidifying my resolve to make a call to AARP, she mentioned some other "awesome" show I'd never heard of.

Her framework is about 17 years wider than mine.

Tuesday, February 17, 2009


I'm sitting here waiting for Aiden to return from the stupid grocery store. Why? Because my dumb body is not going to ever decide whether this particular virus is gone, I guess.

All day I laid in bed whining about Cocoa Pebbles. And sleeping. And watching Hulu but that was during the whining.

He kept offering to go forage at Ye Olde Safeway. I kept being pathetic and what I saw as brave and declining his gallant offers.

The day could not end without them, so he remembered my need for Orange Hi-C when feeling icky and started to head out.

Then he asked if he could just get it from-

NO. It's not the same if it's not on ice and in a McDonald's cup.

I don't know why.

He just returned and has successfully hunted and gathered my supplies to pout into my Pebbles and then go to sleep drunk on Hi-C goodness.

Let's Be Serious

Just for a second, I promise. ish.

Okay, all done.

(I would go on but one of the kids is walking the halls. again.)

(Where'd I put my "thing to beat them with"?)

(That's a joke, don't notify any authorities)

(Or Brandon)

Monday, February 16, 2009

Remember This?

Thanks to Valerie for telling me how to deal with posting videos. You rock.

Sure, they're cute . . .

. . . but if they ever decide to "mark" my clean laundry again, they will have to die. Or, at least get fixed if I'm feeling patient and generous.

President's Day means NO SCHOOL

Except Headstart didn't get the memo.

They also did not send OUT the memo that they would be having school (maybe due to the part where they missed the first memo and therefore didn't know their memo was necessary).

There was a parent teacher conference scheduled with Ashley's teacher this morning leading Aiden to stay up until 2 am cleaning the already clean house. The conference was at 9 am. At 9:30 I got a phone call from the teacher:

"When I talked to you last week did we schedule the conference for today?"


"Did we say nine?"

"uh huuhh..." (this is me being snarky without saying "you messed up!")(Because that would be rude)

"Did you realize it is at the school this time and not at your house?"

Oh. Shoot. "no."

Then she informed me that one of the bus drivers was sick so the buses are not running.

The lack of bus this morning did not help people know/realize there was headstart today (there's like 10 kids in our complex who go between the morning and afternoon).

I decided to see if I could help people get their kids there (so the kids wouldn't miss out) by driving them up with Ashley and I. I have to be there today anyway for a class so it wasn't a big deal at all.

On the way to asking people, I got David to come play with Ashley since Annie was on a date with Aiden.

So I am now posting a blog about HOW BADLY I NEED TO GET THE KIDS OUT OF HERE. Mostly because there are now the girls, two extra boys, and just arrived... another extra preschooler. I am running my own preschool today, I guess.

For the love, I am outta here! but I now get to drive them up the hill and spend the next 4 hours surrounded by MORE preschoolers. Assuming their moms and dad drove them in.

Maybe I should offer to pick them up.

Saturday, February 14, 2009

How I know

When I first met Aiden he was not a firm believer in celebrating Valentine's Day. In fact, he was quite a firm believer in MOCKING Valentine's Day.

Now he celebrates it as well as we can on our budget. This year I got to go out to lunch with him on Thursday since it would be the last time all weekend we had no kids and the babysitter situation didn't look promising. I got a new stuffed frog (somehow this became a thing for us) and a new mirror to replace the one he stole for shaving in the shower with.

But I don't need expensive dinners and jewelry to know he loves me. I don't even need a mirror and a frog.

I know he loves me because of all the other things that happen. This may just become a new label category for me so I can post random things as I think of them.

I know he loves me because we have two bathrooms (which he keeps clean!) and if we both gotta go, or if there is a possibility we will both have to go, he will use the kids' bathroom thus allowing me to use the bathroom free of pee dribbles from bad aim, scary things in the garbage can, toothpaste all over the sink, and the cat box.

That's love.

Friday, February 13, 2009

Friday the 13th. Yes it was.

I had a test today at noon. It was for my class in which we talk about development of kids through age 8. I think I have a pretty good handle on the material so I put off studying until last night. The studying never got to happen. (it all turns out okay as I think I aced the test)

Yesterday afternoon I went to my 2:50 class but got there 15 minutes early. As I was sitting in the super comfy seats (y'know, the desks with the unmovable table-y desk part that was made for super skinny peoples in 1950?) waiting for class to start I felt a familiar tingle.

No, I didn't have to go potty. I had a sore throat. Again. This is how my last cold started a week ago only then it was bilateral (both sides).

Actually, this is how my last cold since I was 8 has started. It is probably how my gall bladder attack started and potentially it is how my water broke and I went into labor. I am honestly surprised I didn't have C-sections via my tonsils. Yep, they are that great.

By the time class started my left tonsil was shooting pain into the left half of my brain and down my throat. I managed to not throw up during class, got through the bus ride home, took my friend home after dinner and made an appointment at my doctor's office for this morning. Then I went to bed.

This morning I noticed my tonsil didn't hurt as much, but that is not saying anything. I threw up and had the runny nose and itchy ears (way deep inside like your tongue should just be able to fix it for you. You guys know what I am talking about, right?).

I went to the doctor's appointment after my first class and she said my lymph node was HUGE on that side. She decided to run the rapid strep test which came back negative. She's pretty sure it's wrong as they miss 5% of the time and wanted to run the longer one for a more accurate result. I didn't think that it was necessary because by this point it didn't hurt like strep hurts so I figured it was just some virus. again.

She said if I start getting worse this weekend to call and they will just phone my prescription over to the pharmacy without even looking at me. Apparently I've probably gone through this horse and pony show enough times to know if I need antibiotics.

So now by my own stupidity and bravado I get to spend my weekend popping Advil for pain, gargling salt water (it dehydrates the viruses and/or bacteria and makes them DIE), and helping Halls have a better stock on Monday.

I also get to write a speech, a paper, and study for 2 tests.

Maybe in my free time I can google how to remove your own tonsils at home. Anyone want to come assist?

Thursday, February 12, 2009

...and mine.

1. Holly needs some more details to fireup her own fantasies. (hi, Mom!)

2. Holly looks like a femme fatale lounging on her red lounge. Kind of regal like. (what I aspire to)

3. Holly says that the focus on her décolletage doesn't concern her. (work what you have, right?)

4. Hef's Holly Wants Less Plastic in Playboy. (This Holly doesn't care)

5. Holly does have a strange build. (it's called FAT)(I had to go through 3 pages to get past some porno that also starts with "Holly does". Awesome.)

6. Holly hates fur on her back... (I edited this sentence because it was about Hef's ex again so there was a less than savory ending.)

7. Holly asks if Eve is going to kill her, since everyone will know it was her. (note to self, no friends named "Eve")

8. Holly likes to sing (yes, yes I do)

9. We wonder how much Holly eats (more than you, that's why I am fatter than you.)

10. And Holly wears the crown. (of course she does!)

11. Holly was arrested for shoplifting in Puerto Rico, while visiting an old pimp daddy, and was locked up in an old dilapidated jail. (at least it requires a lot of story, like everything I do!)

12. Holly loves the sea. (it kept her man safe and spit him back out so she could find and marry him)

I think it's fun so I'm posting his...

1) Type in "[your name] needs" in the Google search.
2) Type in "[your name] looks like" in Google search.
3) Type in "[your name] says" in Google search.
4) Type in "[your name] wants" in Google search.
5) Type in "[your name] does" in Google search.
6) Type in "[your name] hates" in Google search.
7) Type in "[your name] asks" in Google search.
8) Type in "[your name] likes " in Google search.
9) Type in "[your name] eats " in Google search.
10) Type in "[your name] wears " in Google search.
11) Type in "[your name] was arrested for" in Google Search.
12) Type in "[your name] loves" in Google Search.

Put the a response from the first page, preferably the first (assuming it's a complete thought, if not a complete sentence).

**I had to use some responses with the AIDAN spelling of my name since the AidEn spelling is less common.**

1. Aiden just needs to lie back and think about the meaning of the universe. (I'm a poet, I do that all of the time.)

2. Aiden looks like a mushroom! (When I wait to long to get my hairs cut I do!)

3. Aiden says, "Hello Mr. Pumpkin!" (Cool.)

4. Aiden wants an orange. (Gotta prevent the scurvy. Arrrgghh Matey!)

5. Aiden does the laundry and shows off some stellar moves. (They summed up my typical day pretty nicely, I think!)

6. Aiden hates tummy time. (That's not very true, in fact I prefer it.)

7. Aiden ask for seconds. (And if the food is good, thirds and fourths.)

8. Aiden likes balls. (OK, get your mind out of the gutter. I like soccer balls, basketballs, baseballs . . .)

9. Aiden eats an extremely sour lemon orange hybrid. (K, I don't tend to eat Frankenfruit.)

10. Aiden wears his mercenary outfit. (That sounds FUN!)

11. [Aiden] was arrested and imprisoned in England in 2003 for the London BBC bomb in March 2001 with two other people. (I was wearing my mercenary outfit at the time.)

12. Aiden loves his Cheerios and they love him. (Awwww, Cheerio love!)

25 Random Things. Fine.

I have been tagged by multiple peoples both on here and on Facebook. I finally committed to do it on Shaila's blog so...

1. I bought my first car when I was 18. With my mom and dad's help I talked the dealership down from $6500 to $4550. I have never made as great a deal on a car since then. CLEARLY I need to take Dad with me for all car purchases.

2. I got married at 19 because I had moved to Pullman for school and I got lonely waiting for my roommates to move over. Not a reason I suggest to people for getting married.

3. I wouldn't take back getting married because I got the three best kids in the world from it.

4. I am married to a WAY more controversial type of person now but I love him more than I ever thought a person could love someone who wasn't their own child or parent.

5. I think life would be really fun (which is my goal) if it was like a musical. Could you imagine people randomly breaking into song to explain things? Awesome.

6. I have kids who are just like me. I'm sorry, Mom.

7. I get a sick pleasure from taking tests. I will miss this part of school whenever I graduate.

8. I always think I am going to fail tests. Aiden no longer lets me stress before tests by saying "I'm going to fail" because then it always goes like this:
"I'm going to fail".
"you always say that, no you are not going to fail".
"but I mean it this time. I really really mean it".
"you always say THAT, too!".

9. My favorite things include falling asleep to a good book, watching movies with my family, singing, and attempting to understand how Aiden is not as jazzed by science things as I am.

10. The last part of #9 is usually done as I am in the throws of trying to explain something to him. I think I am doing it in really simple terms or maybe drawing off a term I previously explained. Eventually I notice the blank stare on the randomly nodding head and give up.

11. I wish I was magic. Secretly I imagine what I would use my powers for (always good, generally cleaning or transportation).

12. I am a gossip. I try not to be malicious about it but I don't know if I always succeed.

13. I smoke.

14. I harbor delusions that I could be a professional singer. But I am often too shy to sing in front of people and do a good job. I will purposely not do my best.

15. I would always choose to laugh over cry. Unless I'm sick. Or stressed. Or mad. Or... seriously, I almost never cry.

16. I cannot stand sitcoms like The Nanny where the jokes are so obviously set up. But I still watch them if I come across them on TBS or something.

17. I hate Reba McEntire's music (mostly) and I CANNOT stand her movies from the 80s or 90s or whatever but I LOVED her show REBA on WB.

18. I would totally have an affair with David Boreanaz but not from his Buffy days. Only Bones.

19. I like looking up my favorite movies (or movies I hate)(or any movie I am currently watching) on and read the goofs and trivia.

20. My feet grew almost 2 full sizes while I was pregnant and now they are down to just 1 full size bigger.

21. I hate being pregnant but wouldn't say no to a baby being given to me.

22. I have tried to die during childbirth twice. Sort of.

23. I lettered in drama and football in high school. I managed the football team with a friend of mine and another kid. The team took a vote and had my friend and I letter in football and the other kid (a boy) got to letter in football management. ha!

24. I skipped my high school 10 year reunion last summer because I HATED high school.

25. I still don't feel like the grown up most days. Every once in a while I have a kid jump to attention when I say something to them and I remember I am almost 30. whoa.

Tag yourself if you want to do it. I'm stealing Shaila's idea on that since I also don't like to be put on the spot. but if you haven't done it, do it. It's hard and probably builds character or something.

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

That's Enough Already

My poor wife got hit with a sciatic nerve attack tonight and hobbled to the bedroom before we had even tucked the kiddos in for the night. She finished her book during a nice session with the heating pad.

I've been trying to watch Cinderella Story for the past few days, as I never saw it when it was still a big deal. I finally put it on tonight while folding the last of the laundry. Half way through the DVD stopped working. In fact, it stopped working to the point I thought it was going to take the DVD player down with it. I tried it in the laptop but it started making sounds that scared the cats.

I decided to go to bed. There was just enough light coming through the window for me to realize that my wife had finally found a position comfortable for her back. It involved both of my pillows and most of my side of the bed.

99% of the time I would rather sleep on the couch in these situations. My wife's comfort pretty much always wins out. The couch is actually quite comfortable (it helps that I'm so short and fit on it nicely). However, the cats have now awoken from their day of rest and refuse to stop terrorizing me.

Here is a brief list of some of their favorite nighttime games:
  • Whine at the door until daddy attacks us with the spray bottle.
  • Whine at nothing in particular until daddy attacks us with the spray bottle.
  • Play hide-and-go-seek in the laundry that daddy just finished folding and mock the fact that he can't put the laundry away because if he opened ANY bedroom door in the house we would bolt through it and force him to fumble in the dark to find us. Get attacked by the spray bottle.
  • Jump on the table until daddy hears us and attacks us with the spray bottle.
  • Jump on the counter so we can find something to knock down onto the floor. Once the object is on the floor, wait on the counter until daddy attacks us with the spray bottle.
  • Jump onto the rocking chair sending it careening into the wall, startle ourselves by this noise, jump off the rocking chair sending it careening into the wall once more, then run after each other because, well, it's so much fun.

There are a few things I could probably do (instead of whining on our blog), but all I really want to do is watch my darn movie! Plus, many of the things I have to take care of involve opening at least one of the doors. And, as previously mentioned, opening any of the doors at night around here is a really bad idea.

Maybe I'll iron. And find a different movie to watch. And spray the cats some more because that is always a good time.

Sunday, February 08, 2009

she turned out to be good for a laugh

Someone I really didn't like in high school but who has decided we are friends on facebook has a series of pictures of her kids on her facebook page.

The first is her oldest petting a goat through a fence.

The second is her daughter petting the goat through the fence.

The third is her youngest boy pushed up to the fence in the stroller watching the goat eat his Cheerios off the tray.

He's slightly(!) offended.

I love it.

The Wheels on the Bus go round and round. So does Justice

Being a big kid isn't all it's cracked up to be.

We got a phone call on Thursday from Jim at the bus garage. I was so excited to hear what he had to tell me about my kid. Turns out there's a new bus driver on the route and he has talked to my son repeatedly about being more quiet/in control of himself/NORMAL on the bus so he (the bus driver) can focus on driving safely.

In fairness to Alex, his ADHD meds don't normally kick in until he's had them in his tummy for 30 minutes and he gets on the bus after 5 or 10 minutes sometimes.

That is all the fairness he got. Upon coming home from school on Thursday he got to sit in his room until I got home. Then the big discussion was had. He tried to blame it on the bus driver being unfair to him. He found out that was NOT going to fly. He cried. He got grounded. For a week.

We've experienced "grounded" before but it's always been kind of a pansy effect. THIS time, he's grounded from

No TV. No computer. No Playstation. No nuffin'. He's got his room, the stuff in it, occasionally his sisters to play with, books, and puzzles.

He was told he could watch a movie with the rest of the family if we all sat down to watch it. Yesterday he was bored bored bored and asked me if I wanted to watch Harry Potter with him.

Nice try.

I keep feeling bad that this is his weekend. Aiden, who is much better at this part, keeps reminding him that if he's old enough to be doing big kid mistakes, he's old enough to have big kid consequences. He doesn't like it but he's learning something.

PS thanks to Mom for telling him about when I was in trouble on the bus. Really. thanks.

Friday, February 06, 2009

a concert and a stand off

I finally made it through a culture inducing and GPA raising concert. This weekend is the festival of contemporary music at WSU. To kick things off they had the faculty composer's concert last night. This was promised to be extra credit and less than an hour so a lot of our class showed up.

While it did NOT last less than an hour (1:45) it DID consist of six songs by four different faculty composers. The first one was a computer generated mess that felt like a bad acid trip. Stephanie and I went together; I think she summed up the first number best: "It felt like that point in those movies where you find out your kid is actually an alien and you rethink everything he's ever said to you". yep

The rest of the concert was not quite as bad but it was not good, either. Until the last two songs. These were composed by our professor's husband who looks a little like Liam Neeson (a LITTLE, like they have similar hairlines and both have two ears...). His two songs were not jarring and scary. They were musical and had pleasant feelings attached to them. It was a nice way to round out the evening.

I got home and there is this orange cat wandering around outside our building. It was out there the other night and Aiden said it followed him around while he looked for a Missing Cat poster. It even kept pace. This cat looks like Garfield. A lot. And he's very sweet and has a broken meower so it comes out all sad and pathetic.

I decided the thing to do was (I don't know why!) to let him in the house. But he wouldn't come in. He just kept standing in the doorway with his head cocked like he was deciding. I don't know what his problem was, maybe the two black cats in the kitchen puffed up and Row-er-ow-er-ower-ing at him was part of it. (Crook proved what a pansy he is by hiding behind Jack which I thought was fantastic).

I picked up this cat and set him juuuust inside the door. He would not make eye contact with me, Aiden, or the cats who were spitting at him. huh.

Eventually I put him back out and we closed the door. Our own two cats, who are from the same litter and have always been together, spent the next half hour puffed up at each other and smelling each other and me and the door and everything else.

Aiden says if they start spraying it is my fault.

Thursday, February 05, 2009

Thumbs down? No, Fingers down (MY THROAT!)

As Aiden pointed out, we had a great time at Safeway today. But since Aiden is short I don't think he got the full view of what was happening.

We were leaving Safeway trying to get me to class in time, yes. And there was a traffic jam, yes. But FIRST I have to say that the traffic jam was discovered as I tried to run into a black woman with orange hair extensions that made her hair and head HUGE and impossible to see around. Thus, I almost ran right into her. Oops. Luckily, I made a full and complete stop without any insurance claims needing to be filed.

Then it looked like we were inching forward but apparently the big hair head was just adjusting herself. Now I was REALLY close to running into her. And Aiden was running into me. It almost got way out of control. Now I am leaning waaaaay over to see around this orange extentioned woman to see what is the problem.

The problem, beyond the part where Safeway doesn't build their sliding doors wide enough to let two carts through at once, is a little boy. He's just standing there messing with everyone's day.
Mom was dealing with her daughter and procurring a cart while explaining over and over why they weren't getting the car cart.

FINALLY we (us, the orange haired woman, and 5 people behind us) get a visual of this woman. She looks like she is taking her kids' medications for them. The daughter was taking off without mom or brother and yet mom just focused on her son now. I wanted to scream at her when I heard her say, "...I don't know... this is some pretty thumbs down behavior..."

Of course she couldn't get OUT of the way before showing her fantastic parenting skills off.

Wednesday, February 04, 2009

Oh My

Don't forget to go back and read all the posts you've missed... As for the movie quotes, the leader is in at 2 of 9. Get answering! I swear there will be a prize that will get mailed out sometime after I finally get Kevin and Kirsten's Christmas Present Mailed out. (damn!)

I have a lot of time on my hands tonight as A) I finished my book B) I have a headache and don't want to read textbooks on Public Speeching and C) I wanted to find SOMETHING fun to read.

I did. I have found sometimes I can go from blog to blog by following links and find funny stuff. After all, if I read a blog, and they read the same one, we have a similar sense of humor, right? Yes. Unfortunately this doesn't always work. Sometimes I find people who appreciate the same humor but cannot write anything funny or even interesting.

BUT I found The Meanest Mom this way (thanks Heather!) and now I have found one I may be stalking soon. Anyway, Here's a post from her blog. I find it entertaining as I am sure anyone with kids would. For your pleasure, read the dang link.

Don't Quote ME On It

Awhile back Valerie did a post on her favorite movie quotes. I didn't think I would be able to top that, party because a lot of them are my own favorites. Then last night we watched a movie (we've been watching a lot of old releases since nothing good is coming out) that reminded me of one of my favorites. As I have no homework right now, I am going to compile my own list now.

First, a bit of trivia: According to, while filming Stake Out, Richard Dreyfuss and Emilio Estevez were having a movie trivia contest on the set one day. Estevez asked Dreyfuss to identify the movie that the line "This is no boating accident" was from. Dreyfuss didn't recognize the quote, despite the fact that he was the actor who said it in Jaws (1975). Deciding that this was too good to pass up, this incident was re-enacted for the film.

Okay, see if you can name the movies these quotes come from:

1. Little Miss "Look at my butt. Everybody, Thomas, Look at my butt". Heart and Souls

2. How dumb do you think I am?
--How dumb is there? Excess Baggage

3. One plus two plus two plus one. (and many other variations of that sequence) Clue

4. I wear a size six but a seven feels so good, I buy an eight. Steel Magnolias

5. That sanctuary looks like it's been hosed down with Pepto-Bismal. Steel Magnolias

6. He's chasing her, you're chasing him, and who's chasing you? Nobody. My Best Friend's Wedding

7. Crème brûlée can never be Jell-O. YOU could never be Jell-O. My Best Friend's Wedding

8. I am removing the superfluous buns! Father of the Bride

9. O-kaaay, he's your baby. Tarzan... the Disney cartoon one.

I will admit, there are a couple of movies that appear more than once.

This is just a random sampling of my favorites, by no means all my favorites. Just that first one sparked me.

Whoever gets the most right wins a prize. I don't know what, but a prize will be found.

Update: Valerie wins since she's the ONLY ONE who bothered to comment. I will figure out a prize of some sort by... Easter. I'm awful. But the Christmas Present still hasn't been purchased or sent out. We thought we had it ready to go but then we changed our minds.

(no more rhyming about that...) anybody want a CAT?

I had to twist Princess Bride to get it to work but I figured it's better than just straight out trying to give away my cat. Maybe this way someone is dumb enough to think the cutesy rhyme is due to the cutesy cat.


I was laying in bed next to my dear Aiden last night, doing the "what the heck is wrong with that one kid?!?!" discussion as we tried to fall asleep. He is usually the one who can't sleep but had taken two Tylenol PM so he would sleep for sure. I can ALWAYS fall asleep but not if I stay up past that point. The one where you get your second wind and are then wound up and cannot sleep for... ever?

I also cannot fall back to sleep once I actually wake up. In this light Aiden moved the cat box out of our bathroom and into the kids'. I know he posted about it but here's the kicker: I can now sleep, the cats are not climbing on me and clawing me to hold on as I try to roll over. Grrr...

But now they sit at the bedroom door and crrrryyyy all night. I can sleep but AIDEN is kept up all night by the damn cat. Sigh.

It's only one cat that is doing the crying. (guess which one is available.)

Part of the talking last night led to how crazy the cats are (I had been telling Mom about them on the phone). On cue there was the requisite crying at the door. Clearly it's Crook. it went on for a little while and then I got sick and tired of it and barked back at the door.

It shut him up for a few minutes. It also made Aiden re-think being married to me. Luckily he just laughed. In fact, when it started back up after awhile, Aiden barked at the door.

That got him to stop for a bit also but THEN came the running at the door. How do we know he ran at the door? Because he doesn't stop until his head runs into the door. BAM!

They have also managed to jump at the door handle, hit it just right, and get the door open. This was apparently the tactic he chose to employ next. Y'know that cartoon spring sound? Boi-oi-oi-oi-oing! This is the sound our door handle makes when Crook tries to jump it open.

I don't know what happened but I eventually fell asleep. Long after Tylenol PM boy did. And then Ashley came in to tell me she had to go potty.

I wonder what else I can bark at today? I'm that tired.

**This was a lot funnier in my head last night as I couldn't sleep.**

Sunday, February 01, 2009

Like Common Sense, Honesty at the Bank Did Develop!

In case I haven't whined to you directly, I am sick. I have an awesome cold that is playing around at coming on. Normally I would be just fine with it not really hitting. But then I have a fever of 102. Awesome.

Because I didn't get out of bed until 11 this morning, Aiden took pity on the kids who had played so quietly until then. He took them out for McDonald's, the library, and Lick's for ice cream. I got to lay on the couch and feel sorry for myself while watching movies and accomplishing NOTHING. It was great.

On the way home from their 4 hours of fun they stopped at Blockbuster to drop off movies. On the ground Aiden found nineteen dollars. So he turned it in to the people at Blockbuster. He told the kids what happened and why we don't keep the money we find on the sidewalk. They talked about how you probably can keep a dollar because people don't come back for a dollar but you don't keep nineteen dollars because that might be some student's budget for food for a week. Or something. It's all fairly lost on the kids anyway so...

We were talking about it again tonight and I was reminded of a primary activity we had one Saturday when I was little. There were a bunch of different stations or something set up, I don't remember exactly. What I do know is in one room there was a bank set up and everyone was to withdraw one dollar from the bank. And those primary women were baiting us all by handing out TWO to each kid. All the kids were being honest and giving it back.

Then my class got there. We had to have the worst average of all the classes. Maybe it was the age, maybe it was individuals, I don't know, but no one tried to give it back. Our poor teacher had to block the door to the room so we couldn't get out until we gave back our money.

In fairness to myself, I hadn't counted my money, just assumed the bank was doing their job. When it was pointed out to me, THEN I tried to keep it. But I got into that predicament halfway through it. Really.

As we talked about it tonight I laughed and said it was probably a sign of what kind of person I'd be in life. And then I remembered another little bank story about me:

A couple of years ago US Bank made a deposit of like six grand into my account. "all right!" was my first thought. I let it sit there for a couple of weeks figuring whoever DID make the deposit would be sure to notice what happened, the bank would pull the records, realize where it went and fix it. It never happened. Then I was talking to a friend about it and they said that the bank will eventually find it and charge me money for having had it. And apparently if there is money in your account that you don't immediately report as not yours, it's a federal crime.

I don't know how true that all is, but it was scary enough to get me to call my branch. I had to argue with the teller that it was, in fact, not my money. I mean, if they want to gift it to me for reals, GREAT! but I'm not taking it like this. I had to pull up a copy of the deposit slip on the Internet and tell the teller what account it WAS supposed to be in.

He finally got it out of my account. I don't know where it ended up but it is not my fault. I had to go in and sign a paper saying I was the one reporting it.

And then they credited me $5 for the mistake on my account.

It's Now the Kids' Problem

As Holly has previously mentioned our two cats are the best cats ever (can hear me snickering?). I will leave you with a short list of their wonderful, charming attributes:
  1. They play in their cat food sending it flying far from their food bowl. And then they whine because their food bowl is empty and apparently cat food on the floor is too good for them.
  2. When they are fed and have a full bowl of food, they look down their kitty noses at the kibble as if we were feeding them something from their cat box.
  3. The cat box is a toy.
  4. Ashley goes to school every day with at least one new scratch on her. This is, of course, not entirely of the cats' doing. She totally antagonizes them, smothers them, or does some other horrible thing to cause such recourse.
  5. They climb e-ver-y-thing. If we're particularly lucky, they knock something over in the process.
  6. They have have figured out how to get on the kitchen counters.
  7. One of them whines at the door to be let out. Constantly. Incessantly. All.of.the.time.
  8. The best and sometimes only bed they will sleep on is Holly. And only while Holly is also trying to sleep.

To remedy this last problem we moved the cats' food and water to the hall so we could kick them out during sleeping hours. Because the cat box is in our bathroom (with only an entrance through our bedroom) one of us would have to open the door at some point in the night. We learned this when we discovered cat poo in the kids' bathtub. At least they had the decency to not poo on the carpet.

Well, the cats wised up to our plans. Instead of simply pooing in the cat box once we open the door in the middle of the night, they have realized that Holly is still sleeping at this time and must be slept upon.

NO MORE! I have figured out a way to get the cat box to fit in the kids' bathroom without too much problem. Well, it fits without too much problem. It living in their bathroom could cause plenty of problem. I foresee the kids standing on it, Ashley playing in it (ick, I know, but she's done it before), or the kids forgetting and shutting the door leaving the cats no way to access it.

But I don't care. I don't want my wife waking up at 4 a.m. anymore because the cats are using her as a pillow and she can't fall back to sleep.

I'll move it when company comes over because even though I maintain it fairly well, it is still a cat box. Now I'll just have to remember to remove the cat box and leave a roll a high quality toilet paper in the kids' bathroom when our honored guests (read: 4 year-olds visiting for play dates or Holly's college friend) arrive.